søndag 5. august 2012
mandag 30. mai 2011
søndag 6. mars 2011
statusstalker.com fun and games #3 ^^
My couch love playing hide n seek with the remotes, smart bastard always wins too.I usually don't care what people are saying until they start whispering.
Anti-Depression Tip: Go to your local Wal-Mart and hang out by the fitting rooms. Instant "OMG I'M SO GLAD I'M NOT THEM!" happy.
If your password is your name, you deserve to be hacked.
If you send me a "send this back" text, I will send it back to you 100 times.
I really don't feel like "occasionally" stirring this
Just met one of those people that start laughing at things you said 10 minutes ago....because they just "got it"
(Glass breaks) woman: I think someones breaking in! Man: I'll take care of this (grabs a toilet brush) Woman: A toilet brush? What are you going to do scrub him to death? Man: Would you want to be touched with this?
I'm at the end of my Nerds Rope.
Dear Facebook: Stop being like my mom and suggesting people for me to be friends with.
When your dad is mad and asks you, “Do I look stupid?” Don’t answer him.
would like to remind any unhappy souls today that St Valentine was beaten to death with clubs
If I worked at a restaurant on Valentine's Day I would put a fake engagement ring in every girl's drink.
Bieber Fever is a lot like the chickenpox. It's healthy for kids to get it, but adults with it should seek immediate medical attention.
How people can STILL spell my name wrong when posting on my Facebook wall is mind blowing..
If swimming is great exercise, explain whales to me
This new Facebook picture viewer is really freaking me out.
Just got on email from Myspace asking "Where Have You Been?" Well Myspace, it hasn't been 2006 in awhile.
Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say, "Close Enough."
Why is it that the more annoying the tune, the harder it is to get it out of your head?
Statusstalker.com-funnies #2. XD
I can no longer "drop it like it's hot", so I "squat like it's warm".
I didn't do it! Unless I was supposed to do it. Then of course I did it!
I think Caller ID needs to be more specific and say things like "Won't stop calling until you answer" or "Some guy you gave your number to while drunk."
we all know "watch a movie" means "I wanna be in the dark with you"
Got pulled over after making a wrong turn at a donut shop... The cop walked up to the window and said, "Do you know why I pulled you over?" Without hesitation I responded; "(pointing to the box) Cause you can smell it?"
If you want me to go running with you, I'm going to need some motivation...Like a clown waving a bloody knife and chasing us.
Even though I don't have any, I know I'd be great at raising kids because when I was little I had like 5 Tamagotchis at once.
The reason why I don't speak to you anymore is because I keep telling myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would.
You've just gotta love that awkward moment when you start telling a story and you realize no one's listening, so you slowly fade out and pretend you never said anything.
May your crotch be infested by the crabs of a thousand hookers and your arms too short to reach and scratch.
When a spambot tells you to click a link to take an IQ test, that IS the IQ test.
How busy can you actually be if you just took the time to change your online status to say so.
If you are ever wondering who is rapping in a song, just wait 4 more seconds and he'll say his name.
"Let's save this so we can throw it away in few days" - Tupperware
I wish facebook had an "I don't give a shit" button.....
I didn't do it! Unless I was supposed to do it. Then of course I did it!
I think Caller ID needs to be more specific and say things like "Won't stop calling until you answer" or "Some guy you gave your number to while drunk."
we all know "watch a movie" means "I wanna be in the dark with you"
Got pulled over after making a wrong turn at a donut shop... The cop walked up to the window and said, "Do you know why I pulled you over?" Without hesitation I responded; "(pointing to the box) Cause you can smell it?"
If you want me to go running with you, I'm going to need some motivation...Like a clown waving a bloody knife and chasing us.
Even though I don't have any, I know I'd be great at raising kids because when I was little I had like 5 Tamagotchis at once.
The reason why I don't speak to you anymore is because I keep telling myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would.
You've just gotta love that awkward moment when you start telling a story and you realize no one's listening, so you slowly fade out and pretend you never said anything.
May your crotch be infested by the crabs of a thousand hookers and your arms too short to reach and scratch.
When a spambot tells you to click a link to take an IQ test, that IS the IQ test.
How busy can you actually be if you just took the time to change your online status to say so.
If you are ever wondering who is rapping in a song, just wait 4 more seconds and he'll say his name.
"Let's save this so we can throw it away in few days" - Tupperware
I wish facebook had an "I don't give a shit" button.....
fredag 4. februar 2011
torsdag 3. februar 2011
mandag 31. januar 2011
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